Tuesday, September 15, 2020

Hung Out To Dry: The 5 Worst Kinds of Hammocks I’ve Ever Bought

worst hammocks

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There’s nothing quite like swinging into the fall season curled up in your favorite hammock—unless you end up buying the wrong one.

Maybe you found a hammock that looks just right for you to curl up in, or maybe you saw one that will be the perfect addition to your outdoor boho-chic decor. Whatever your hammock goals are, chances are there’s a right one (and several wrong ones) for the job.

After spending countless hours in a lot of disappointing hammocks, I know exactly which ones are worth buying, and the ones you’re probably better off skipping. Here are the worst kinds of hammocks I’ve ever bought, and how to avoid a similar fate.

1. Two-person hammock

hammock

Unless you plan on regularly using your two-person hammock for two people (or one person plus a very large dog), you can skip getting this model. Unlike single hammocks, which will perfectly cradle your head and body, a two-person hammock used by one is like sitting in a cocoon from hell. You’ll be hot, you’ll be tangled, and you’ll wish you had a person to share your hammock with, which will further induce all sorts of feelings of loneliness and regret.

Worst of all? These two-seaters are so huge, they wrap around you, effectively turning you into a human taquito. You won’t be able to appreciate the arboreal views above you—much less hold up a book to read.

Alternatively, if you find yourself looking for a hammock to camp in, this might be a winner—wrapped up in it like a mummy, you’re guaranteed to be protected from any critters romping around in the night.

2. All-white knitted hammock

white hammock
White hammock with fringe

Amazon

These all-white, drapey fabric hammocks look adorable on Instagram. But in reality, they’re about as practical as all the other white clothes and furniture you own—and just as prone to getting filthy in no time.

Considering lounging in your new addition with a cup of coffee or glass of vino? Pretty soon you’ll be running for the OxiClean. And something tells us that once your all-white hammock has a big brown or red spot, it won’t really complete the boho look you were going for.

But if you still really want that dreamy all-white hammock, at least do yourself a favor and make sure it’s machine-washable—and that you have some sort of plan for washing it without getting all those lacy bits tangled in the machine.

3. Cheap hammock chair

cheap hammock chair
Cheap hammock chair

Amazon

Hammock chairs can be a great additional bit of seating for your backyard hang spot. Which is why it can be so tempting to go for the cheapest seated hammock you can find online. But think twice before clicking “add to cart.” Unlike full-length lounging hammocks, these smaller woven ones get all out of whack once they snag—and become impossible to enjoy again.

All it takes is one zipper or belt buckle to pull a string loose, and then you’ll have either a floppy section of hammock or a piece that runs so tight it will cut off circulation—or both. And unless you’re a wiz at macrame, these types of mishaps are all but impossible to fix. Plan on spending a bit more to find your perfect hammock chair, or just skip this purchase altogether.

4. Hammock with stand

hammock stand
Hammock stand

Amazon

Sometimes you just don’t have the right two trees for your ultimate chill spot, and that’s OK. But be careful when choosing a hammock that comes with a stand. If it’s anything like the canvas hammock I tried, it feels more like lying across a solid wood board than relaxing in the great outdoors.

The problem with these stand hammocks is that you just don’t get the same level of adjustability you have between two trees, so you might not be able to lie down comfortably. This could mean a hammock that sinks all the way to the ground, or one that’s so tightly drawn that you have to lie in plank position. If you do go the hammock stand route, just be sure it has enough adjustability to avoid these two extremes.

5. Sunbrella hammock

Sunbrella hammock
Sunbrella hammock

Amazon

Despite their convenience, weatherproof Sunbrella hammocks simply aren’t that great. While they might be easy to use and clean, they’re also just plain uncomfortable. If you need a pillow to make a hammock comfortable (these hammocks often come with small pillows like those freebie ones on airplanes), it’s just not working.

Softer fabrics, while less resilient, are always better for hammocks. They’ll mold to your position, rather than the other way around. And although a less resilient fabric might not be able to withstand a hurricane or a derecho, here’s an idea: just store the hammock inside.

The post Hung Out To Dry: The 5 Worst Kinds of Hammocks I’ve Ever Bought appeared first on Real Estate News & Insights | realtor.com®.

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